Tag: suicide cw

~ sittingoverheredreaming ~ Leave a comment

Last post about it for now, I promise. 

I don’t really know what to do now. The hospital visit probably isn’t going to change anything, except for that my wife missed another day of work and is probably going to quit. And maybe they should quit! Going to work has been making them miserable. (And that is really hard to swallow for me, but it’s clearly harming them more than the usual, so, ????) I want to be supportive, but we’ve tried having them not work. It has also been bad! I’m starting to think there are no good options, and I don’t know what to do with that. Working at least meant they had fewer opportunities to harm themselves. There have been days when they don’t have a job where I make them come to my work and sit in the car all day because I’m too afraid to let them be alone. But both jobs they’ve tried post-college have spiraled into ER visits. Voluntary, but still. But before they had this job, they made an attempt on taking pills, they just changed their mind in time so no damage was done. It seems like nothing works, and there’s stuff beyond circumstance but. They take their meds they do therapy. I convinced them to try a hotline the other day. I don’t know what else to do. 

And I really can’t do anything, and that’s hard on me. I mean, I can do a lot, but it’s all momentary happiness. Holding them or bringing them flowers or making them a stupid farce of a wedding cake makes them smile but then it’s gone, they can’t hold onto it. The big stuff is so out of my hands, except for all the ways I can mess it up.

I know there’s no answer. It’s just hard.

Snumple Update

~ sittingoverheredreaming ~ Leave a comment

keyofjetwolf:

This is certainly not the news I wanted to bring to anyone. I just received word that Xenia’s body was found. I don’t have any other details, save that it wasn’t a crime. Given everything, I believe suicide is most likely.

This is obviously devastating to her family. Hell, it’s pretty fucking upsetting to us. I don’t have any clever words. I’ve been expecting this result since I first heard from her brother, though obviously you hold out some small measure of hope until hope runs out.

This is a tremendous loss for us. What do you say to ease that? I wouldn’t even know where to begin. I’d ask only that we all treat each other with kindness and understanding. Everyone will have to grieve and process in their own way, Some may want to talk. Some may never want to say a word. Anger, sadness, and everything in between is valid.

If you’re feeling particularly struck by this, please seek out help. We don’t need to lose anyone else. And love each other. There can never be too much of that in the world.

I will miss you, Snumple. I will miss you so much.

~ sittingoverheredreaming ~ Leave a comment

So awhile back, someone (I think it was rosepetalrevolution) brought up a musical talisman arc/adaptation of 110.

And even ignoring the perfect hilarity of Eudial trying to sing a song into Haruka and Michiru’s answering machine, I’ve been thinking a lot about how amazing it would be. 

Just imagine. Michiru breaks free in the cathedral and sings about protecting Haruka. Maybe a line or two about how she brought her into this mess but she won’t let it be the end. She keeps getting cut off by Eudial’s missiles, represented by the stage going dark and flashing red lights while the violins play more intensely. 

Then the final line, “Haruka, I won’t let you die!”

And Eudial shoots, the entire stage goes black and silent.

The lights fade back in. Haruka stares at the talisman.

The pause is a few beats too long; it seems like the song is over. But then, against the silence, Haruka sings, “That’s not fair, Michiru. Going into your own world like that.

But I’ll follow you.”

She wrestles the gun from Eudial and knocks her out in the fight. Usagi runs in just in time to hear the second shot, but all that’s left on the stage now are the two talismans.