Tag: sam writes

Sparkle Sparkle It’s a Fic :D

~ sittingoverheredreaming ~ Leave a comment

My sparklee is none other than @rosepetalrevolution, and as soon as I saw the prompt “PMMM-style AU”, I knew what I had to write. I had a lot of fun with it (and a lot of trouble, lol) so I hope you enjoy it! ~2400 words, and I’d call this BroTP focused, though HaruMichi and Reinako are present.

Minako Magica

“Listen, there’s something off about her lately. “

Haruka rolled her eyes and kept walking. “I’m not asking you two to get along. But—“

“This isn’t about me.” Mina dug her nails into her palm. “I’m worried for you.” There was something in the back of her mind she couldn’t quite call forward. Whenever she saw Michiru, the hairs on the back of her neck prickled and her body tensed as if ready to fight. Something had changed. Minako had never been afraid of the girl, no matter what power her family’s money gave her. “You can feel it too, however much you want to ignore it.”

“She’s… she’s just Michiru.”

Mina noted it wasn’t a no. “Haruka…”

The sunny road around them went dark. Purple shadows danced around them like snakes charmed out of the darkness. Images of smiling faces rained down from a domed black sky.

The most startling thing, to Mina, was that it didn’t feel startling at all. Her immediate thought was Not again and her hand reached for something on her belt that wasn’t there.

Haruka’s back pressed up to hers, and she knew she felt the same way. “What the hell?”

“Another witch.” The words were out before Mina could process them. Another? When had she faced this unreality before?

The shadow struck at them. Despite their insubstantial appearance, every hit they landed stung.  Mina and Haruka split to dodge.

“What do we do?”

“Run,” Mina called out.
“Where? There’s no end!”

“There has to be.” Mina spun around the way they came, but it was the same rounded darkness as in front of them.

“Stay still!” a sharp voice called out. A stream of arrows followed, piecing each shadow and dissolving it into a poof a glitter.

“I’m surprised Miss Deathbringer herself hasn’t come to save you,” came a deeper voice, soon followed by the appearance of a tall brunette girl. Her muscular frame was offset by a green dress bedecked by pink bows and frills but matched by the large hammer slung over her shoulder.

“She’ll be coming.” A smaller girl with streaming black hair leapt down from somewhere Mina couldn’t see. Her outfit was simpler, a long white tunic with a red sash, but she too carried a weapon– a long, exquisitely curved black bow. A bright red jewel was set into the strap of her quiver. “She has felt the danger now.”

“What is going on?”

The new comers turned to Haruka. “It’s a witch,” the larger one said.

The smaller one, who, Mina couldn’t help but notice, was strikingly pretty, squared her shoulders. “You don’t want to know anything more than that.”

“We do.” Mina faced her. “There’s something that’s been happening for awhile, and you’re going to explain it.”

The girl’s eyes narrowed. “I don’t take orders from you now.”

“Rei. We don’t have time.”

She scowled. “Fine. They’ll have to come with us.” Her hand wrapped around Mina’s wrist. A spark leapt up her arm, from a memory she couldn’t grasp or something else Mina couldn’t be sure. They ran forward until the shadows broke upon a larger dome. At the center a dark mass writhed and twisted, flickering like static.

“Mako, go left.” The larger girl nodded and darted away. “You two, stay close.” Rei drew an arrow.

“Aim true,” Mina said automatically.

The smallest smile played on Rei’s lips. “Always.” Her shot landed at the heart of the writhing mass. A screech like crumpling metal washed over them. “And Michiru will be coming right about… now.”

Mina didn’t see her at first. It took a long moment for her eyes to notice the dot of green amongst the black. Her outfit called to mind a Victorian mourning dress, though it was short enough to show her knee high black boots. She bore no weapon. One pale hand reached out to the shadow.

They were back in the light of day.

Michiru picked something up from the street. Mako’s hammer slammed down next to her. “We kept her safe, so you’ll share.”

“Naturally. I’d think you’d be more trusting by now.” She handed the thing, a small black needle with a stylized eye, over. Mina noticed how careful they were not to touch each other.

“I told you something was up with your girlfr…” Mina turned back to Haruka. Her face was in her hands, her whole body was shaking. “What’s wrong?”

“You… you…”

“Minako. You need to leave.” Rei grabbed at her arm, but she shrugged her off.

“Buddy, you gotta talk to me, come on.” Mina reached out to pat Haruka’s shoulder.

“Don’t touch me!” Haruka reeled back, her eyes wide and full of tears. “I remember… I remember what you did… you were… I… I…”

“Haruka.” Michiru’s voice was sharp and soft at the same time in a way Minako could not comprehend. “None of that matters. It no longer happened.”

“I remember,” she repeated as though she hadn’t heard. “I remember.” Something glowed at her chest, a pure yellow rapidly blotted out with darkness.

“No.” Michiru dove for her, but Mako tackled her down.

“Rei!”

Before she could draw an arrow, the light exploded. The same sort of needle Michiru had held a moment ago appeared and burst open. The street again was gone, replaced by a tumultuous but shallow sea. An island of swords lay before them, pinning down something the water hid from view.  Where the light hit each blade a different memory played. Mina and Haruka as kids in the park, Mina and Haruka passing notes at school. Mina and Haruka fighting back to back in gaudy capes.

Mina could not remember the latter.

She felt its vital importance.

“You will tell me what is going on. Now.”

“And then there will be three witches,” Michiru spat from under Mako. “But go on, find out, maybe then you can help protect her for once.”

“No one else is turning.” Mako pressed the first needle to the gem on Michiru’s waist clasp. “Not you, not her.”

“I won’t let you kill Haruka.”

“She’s gone. For good this time.”

Michiru threw Mako off with a strength Minako wouldn’t have believed had she not seen it. Mako’s skin was gray where Michiru’s hands had touched her. She lay panting in the water. Michiru approached the island of swords.

“Let her go,” Rei said quietly. “There’s nothing she can do.” Her eyes landed on Mina’s with unparalleled intensity. “She might be right about you though. It’s not a pleasant memory. And if Haruka can become a witch without being a magical girl, even I can’t know what may happen with you.”

“Have an arrow ready.”

“You couldn’t forget your role as commander, could you?” Rei grunted, but she drew an arrow and pressed it into Mina’s chest with one hand.

“Might as well cop a feel, might be your last chance.”

Rei did not smile. “Are you ready?”

“Absolutely.”

She touched her other hand to Mina’s forehead. The truth opened up in her mind like a storybook. Kyubey’s approach, Mina convincing Haruka to make a wish with her. “We’ll be heroes, isn’t that what you always wanted?” I wish to never be overshadowed, I wish to be admired. She’d hounded Haruka for her wish.

“If I tell you, it won’t come true.”

“That’s not how this works, dummy.”

Kyubey agreed, but Haruka never gave in.

They fought for months just the two of them, back to back, side by side. It was glorious. Mina won talent show after talent show. That was glorious. All life had to offer was theirs. Other magical girls began joining them. Minako lead, and they listened. Rei bickered, but it was charged with something more than insubordination. Minako delighted in the inevitable end of their games.

It was right, until it all went wrong.

Nothing had felt dangerous, really, not until Ami’s soul gem lay shattered next to the grief seed of their latest kill. Doubts crept into Mina’s mind.

And then she found her sister, small precious Usagi, in the belly of a witch.

“Look, Mina! Now I’m just like you!”

I wish to be admired.

The witch launched a bolt through Usagi’s chest. Her eyes went wide as blood poured over the costume that replicated Minako’s so closely.

Minako lead, and people followed her straight unto their deaths.

The echo of her despair washed over her now, how her grief had hatched from her body into something so big and destructive she could only remember spurts. But she remembered Haruka pleading, and she remembered Haruka crumpled at what might have been her feet. Michiru came, and then Kyubey.

“What would you do to bring her back?”

“Anything.”

Mina gripped Rei’s fist, pressed the arrow tip hard against her sternum, but her grief did not hatch a second time. She had killed Haruka, had as good as killed Ami and Usagi, and it hurt but she did not change.

“We’ll fix this.”

Kyubey appeared in the water. “You’ve all made your wishes.”

Mako’s hammer slammed down on him. “Damn you for misleading us all.” Her knuckles were white against the hammer. “He’d lead us all into despair. Don’t give him the satisfaction.”

“We can’t save her,” Rei said. She lacked gentleness, always had, but Mina felt her trying. “I doubt, even, that we can save Michiru.”

The green haired girl stood in the surf. The swords had begun to awaken. They lifted themselves slowly, playing images now of Haruka reaching for Michiru, and Michiru turning away. Michiru keeping her hands in her pockets as they walked. Haruka trying, trying to figure out what changed, to figure out what she’d done.

“I did it for you. It was the only way.”

A sword launched at her, and for a moment Minako was sure she would not dodge. Michiru turned just in time. The blade buried itself in the water.

Michiru’s gem clouded again. “Please, Haruka.”

Minako clenched her fists. The power she’d once had would not come now. It hardly mattered. “We will save Michiru. It’s what Haruka would have wanted.”

Rei sighed, but a spark of determination flitted across her eyes. “Go.”

Minako made her way towards the swords. “It’s me you want, not her. I did this to you, to her, it’s my fault.”

The swords stilled. Minako had the brief thought that maybe reason could work, maybe Kyubey had always lied about being able to talk down witches. But then the thing beneath the swords ripped itself up.

It dripped like water—no, too thick, like blood. Hunks of it stayed pinned beneath the blades, but it was doggish in shape, with navy goop instead of fur. Luminous yellow eyes bore down on Minako.

To Michiru’s credit, she did not flinch away.

Every drip hissed as it hit the water. Minako had a sinking feeling she would find out what sound it would make when it hit skin. “I’m sorry isn’t enough, I know. I should never have convinced you to do this. I should never have done it.”

One large paw shot out. Mina dodged and the whole thing fell into the water, only strings of liquid holding it to the main body.

“I can’t blame you for lashing out. I did the same thing.”

Michiru touched the fallen paw. It shrank down and disappeared. “I have become ruinous. I should have told you, but I didn’t want you to remember.”

The doggish shape whined. The swords turned upwards from the ground and pierced its underbelly. Dark goo poured down. The shape lashed out at them again, again. It struck Michiru. She fell with a bright white burn contorting her face. The beast turned on itself, contorting into painful shapes to bite its own flesh.

“Haruka,” Michiru breathed.

Two realizations hit Minako—one, that this really was still Haruka, two, that she had a plan. A stupid plan, maybe, but a plan. She turned back. Rei had an arrow drawn, aimed at the beast’s heart, Mako had her hammer ready to launch. “You will hold your fire until I say, or until I am dead.” She looked to Michiru. “You will make sure they do.”

“I will do more than that.”

You’ll kill me yourself if Haruka dies again. But it didn’t matter. Maybe it would even be enough to keep Michiru alive if she failed.

Minako walked forward. She was not a magical girl. She’d spent her soul and become a witch. By rights, she should not exist.

Kyubey had said they’d all made their wishes.

But maybe, just maybe, there had been a but on the end of it. If no one asked, he’d never say.

She gripped the hilt of one of the swords. “I wish to find Haruka, whole and alive.” She pulled it out of the dripping belly. Dark liquid came with it, splashing and burning her skin. “I wish to find Haruka, whole and alive.” Another sword, more burns.

“I wish.”

Her arms were covered in blisters and angry red welts.

“I wish.”

Tears stung at her eyes, every splash and splatter stung at her cheeks, her neck.

“I wish.”

Her strength began to fail, a sword came out and swung into her leg.

“I wish.”

The world narrowed to this pain.

“I wish!”

And Kyubey heard.

She felt her soul separate and condense into a gem. She transformed, not into her old costume but into something like her school uniform, how Haruka had known and liked her best. The dog’s legs gave out, Minako dug into the dark liquid as it crashed down on her.

Her hands found Haruka, warm and safe and alive. The witch world faded. Minako cried into her shoulder.

“I’m so, so sorry.”

Haruka held her tightly. “Do you know what my wish was?”

Mina could only shake her head.

“I wished we’d both get through this alive. And you made it come true.” Her grip tightened. “I’m so sorry I doubted you.”

They sobbed into each other for a long while, from relief, from grief, from guilt. Finally, Minako’s eyes met Michiru’s. There was, likely, more grief yet to be had. She prayed it could wait. An hour, a day, just some separation between tragedies.

“Well,” Mako said gently. “I think we all could use some cake.”

They walked off all together. Haruka held Mina’s right hand, and, to Mina’s great surprise, Rei took her left. Minako felt a warmth much quieter than their usual fire. On the other side, Michiru let Haruka link her arm through hers, careful to keep her jacket covering her skin. Mako flanked Rei. She lacked her usual smile but was somehow still reassuring; she would keep them from despair.

Whatever would happen later, in that moment Mina felt sure that they could keep making it through.

Angstober 18/24

~ sittingoverheredreaming ~ Leave a comment

Major Illness/A Terrible Secret

Another installation of Haruka Dies! Doc and Dreaming’s Angstober fun! I can’t really justify this being late for BOTH prompt days it works for, as it is a) not long (1177 words) and b) more like 3 drabbles strung together than a proper fic. BUT HERE IT IS. Chronologically, this takes place first, then this, this, this, and finally this.

Haruka could never get in the habit of going to the doctor. She took Himeka religiously, not a check up was missed nor a fever unevaluated. Michiru got her encouragement to go as well, even. But Haruka herself? Her mother’s old admonishments played in her head every time. Never mind that they had excellent insurance now, that even without Michiru’s parents’ money they made enough to comfortably cover almost any copay that was thrown at them, Haruka had to suck it up.

It had worked so far. But now here she was, waiting on a blood test to determine what scary unpronounceable word applied to her.

No, none of them applied to her. The doctor was overreacting, saying things to run more tests and get more money. That was what doctors did. If Haruka was really sick, she’d be in bed.

Just that morning, she’d walked Himeka to school. The moment they’d gotten out of Michiru’s watchful gaze, her little girl had lifted up her arms. “Papa, I want to ride!” Haruka hoisted her onto her back, running and jumping along the rode side as Himeka screamed with laughter.

Maybe that had taken more out of her than it should have, but that was part of getting old, wasn’t it? And if she’d gotten a little thin, she just hadn’t been eating enough, her metabolism had always been hard to keep up with. And if she’d passed out at work, that just meant—

“Ms. Tennoh?”

She stood. The doctor’s face was worn with lines behind her glasses. They all converged into an image of worry.

“Is there anyone with you? Anyone you would like us to call?”

Haruka opened her mouth to say her wife, they could call Michiru. But this was bad news. Michiru didn’t deserve bad news in the middle of the day. “No, I’d like to hear this alone.”

—-

Himeka bounded out of the school’s double doors and straight into Haruka’s arms. “Papa! Look what I made!” She held up a paper nearly as long as her arm-span emblazoned with a finger painted pink pig.

“You’re taking after your mama, I see.”

Himeka beamed. “Can you carry me home?”

Haruka hesitated.

You need to take it easy. We’ll run more tests when you come back tomorrow, but it’s very likely that a tumor…

“Of course, princess.” They were wrong, they had to be wrong. She’d fought a goddamn war against aliens and demons and god only knew what else, and if she could get through that then she couldn’t die now. Haruka took Himeka on her shoulders and ran.

“Papa, slow down!”

But she couldn’t. Whatever was inside her was going to catch her, and her old instincts kicked in. Charge into battle or run away. Haruka’s pulse rang in her ears, her heart felt like it was ripping apart with every ragged breath. Himeka leaned in and held onto her for dear life. Haruka hoped she would never let go.

Michiru wasn’t home yet when they got there. “What do you say we make dinner for Mama tonight?”

“Mama wants pizza.”

“Does she?”

Himeka straightened her stance and nodded solemnly. “She ab-sol-ut-el-y does.” She smiled. “That’s a good word, isn’t it?”

“A very good word.” Haruka rummaged in the cupboard to find their pizza pan. “Is it on your vocabulary list?”

“No, Auntie Mina taught it to me.”

Haruka laughed, but it ripped at her throat halfway up and brought tears in her eyes. Where was she going to be when Mina started teaching Himeka less savory things? Who was going to yell at her when she told Himeka about condoms or the best way to pick pocket men? Minako wouldn’t give a flying fuck about any of Michiru’s objections, Haruka had to be there. She grabbed the pan and retreated into the light.

“You’re the smartest girl I’ve ever known, you know that?”

Himeka frowned. “But Kimi is better in—“

“No.” Haruka scooped her up. “You’re my smartest girl.” She ruffled her hair. “And the prettiest, and the bravest, and—“

“Papa stop!” Himeka giggled into her shoulder. “You’re being silly.”

“Am I? I’d better stop, there’s no room for silliness in pizza making.”

There was, it turned out, a lot of room for silliness in pizza making.  By the time Michiru walked in there was a very lopsided pizza in the oven and quite a lot of sauce on the counter and their faces. Not a drop on Himeka’s white shirt, though, Haruka had to proudly note.

Michiru hung her coat on the wrack with a resigned smile. “Sometimes I forget I’m coming home to two children.”

“Mama, we made you dinner!”

“I see that.” She grabbed a paper towel and wiped Himeka’s face. “I trust you kept your Papa in line? We’re not having candy?”

Himeka nodded. “I was very stern.” That was probably a Rei word, Haruka mused. Perhaps Rei…

Michiru peered into the oven. “You even put some vegetables on, well done.”

“Hey.” Haruka wrapped her arms around Michiru from behind. “The spinach was my idea.”

“I’m shocked.” She turned and gave Haruka a peck on the cheek. “But I suppose if you’ve both been so good, we might be able to have the dessert I got from Mako…”

Himeka shrieked with delight.

—-

An ordinary evening had no right to be so beautiful, Haruka mused as she climbed into bed that night. It wasn’t fair for the universe to throw everything she had to lose in her face. She’d get better. She swore to God she’d get better, even if the doctors were right in their suspicions. Michiru and Himeka needed her.

“I got an interesting call today,” Michiru said from the bathroom.

Haruka’s heart dropped. Michiru knew, and would be so scared, and Haruka didn’t want to do this tonight, Michiru didn’t deserve it. “Oh?”

Michiru came into the bedroom. Her robe hung off her shoulders, but she clutched it around her chest. “You fainted at work. Mikey thought I should know.”

Damn it, Mikey. She’d have to talk to him about this, she didn’t call his wife about personal business. But it wasn’t the hospital, and that was something. “Yeah, I… I guess I didn’t eat enough or something.”

A lie for protection was alright, wasn’t it?

Michiru’s brow knotted. “You have been…” She pressed her lips together. She’d noticed, then, that Haruka had lost weight. Haruka prayed that was all.  “I guess we’ll have to make pancakes in the morning to make sure this doesn’t happen again.”

Haruka smiled, but a hurricane roared inside her. “Come here.”

Michiru climbed onto the bed. Haruka put her hands on her waist, thumbs caressing the fabric over her hips. “I love you.” She pressed her head into her neck. “So much.”

“I love you, Haruka.” Her arms wrapped around Haruka’s body, one hand tangling into her hair. “Please never scare me like that again.”

“I won’t.” Haruka would keep her secret until she got better. She kissed along the edge of Michiru’s robe. “I promise.”

Angstober 22

~ sittingoverheredreaming ~ Leave a comment

“Imagine the doctor telling one of them, “She’s gonna go at any moment.” and so the other is struggling to say awake and be with them in the last moment, but eventually falls asleep, and while she’s asleep the other just slips away”

I’VE BEEN SLACKING FOR TOO LONG (the last two weeks have been an absolute whirlwind).  A continuation from Day 5. ~700 words

She’d watched them leave.  Michiru’s mother had at least had the decency to cry, but she’d let her husband escort her out with a firm hand. “There’s nothing we can do. We’ll only be in the doctor’s way.” They hadn’t so much as looked at Haruka, tucked into the corner of the waiting room. She felt a wave of a feeling too twisted to name. Staying here wouldn’t put them in the way, it was what a waiting room was for, and the doctors had said all they could do was ease Michiru’s pain anyway, shouldn’t they want to be with her instead of their socialite dinner guests? Hadn’t Haruka been right about them all along? But that was what brought Michiru here. Haruka could not resent them. 

She found her way to Michiru’s room in their wake. It was too bright for the time of night, too bright for the injuries she’d sustained. The purples and blues and horrible garish reds that mottled her skin were thrown into too strong a contrast with the sterile white surroundings. Michiru would have said something about color composition. She did that sometimes, illuminating the art that could be found in life for Haruka’s uncultured appreciation. But Michiru couldn’t say anything now. A tube ran down her throat to keep her breathing.

“Excuse me.” A nurse tapped on Haruka’s shoulder. “It’s family only now.”

“I’m…” Haruka cleared her throat. “I’m her sister.” 

The nurse eyed her lanky frame, then Michiru’s delicate broken body in the bed. Cousin, why hadn’t she said cousin? That was family, and more believable. Haruka could do nothing right. But then the nurse cast her eyes to Haruka’s face, and her gaze softened.  

“She’s going to go at any moment. We can’t do anything more.” She patted Haruka’s back. “It’s good if she has someone.” 

Haruka didn’t want to try her luck by climbing into Michiru’s bed, so she pulled the hard plastic chair they gave her as close as she could. “Hey, Michi.” Her hand was the wrong shape, they hadn’t bothered setting the bones in light of the rest of the damage they couldn’t fix. Haruka held it anyway. Michiru had taken such care of her hands. An artist’s pride, she’d always said.  Her callouses her still there, the only thing that felt right to the touch. 

“I’m—“ Haruka’s breath caught. “Let’s run away together. We don’t need this place, I’ve been saving up money.” She stroked Michiru’s hair. It was still beautiful, even tangled and bloody as it was. “I was gonna buy you a ring, a real nice one, but that can wait.” Haruka tried to smile. “You know I love you, even if I can’t do all the things I’m supposed to for you. I want to take care of you as best I can.”

She would have, she swore she would have. She never could have given Michiru the life she was used to, but she’d have done everything she could to make up for it. Haruka loved her. Wasn’t that something more than she’d had? Money couldn’t buy that. Her parents had it all, and they didn’t even bother to stay, that wasn’t love. Haruka was here for her. 

Even though Haruka put her here.  

“I’m sorry.” Haruka kissed Michiru’s gnarled hand. “They were right about me, weren’t they? I did ruin you.” She cried then, hating that it was more for herself than for Michiru. If she loved her, she should have stayed at the goddamn dinner. She’d left, just like Michiru’s parents, how could she hate them for it?  
“I won’t leave you again. I’m gonna be here. I’m here Michiru.” She rested her head on her pillow. “You’re not gonna be alone.”

She stroked Michiru’s marred cheek. The heart monitor beeped like clockwork as all Haruka’s emotions began weighing heavily on her eyelids. She had to stay awake until it stopped. She had to be here. And maybe it would never stop, and there would be a miracle, and she had to be awake…

Someone was shaking her. “Sweetie, you… we have to move her.”

Haruka’s head shot up. The heart monitor was switched off. Michiru’s skin was cold. 

There had been just one thing Haruka could do for her, and she’d failed.

Angstober Day 7

~ sittingoverheredreaming ~ Leave a comment

“Imagine one of these two assholes is terminally ill, but decides not to tell the other because REASONS I GUESS”

This was supposed to be a standalone thing, but it ended up fitting pretty well as a possible lead in to Doc’s prequel to my Day 3. But that’s complicated and not really necessary, so here goes. ~580 words, and a warning that it’s not edited very thoroughly because my alarm didn’t go off this morning.

—–

“I’m calling her.”

Haruka crossed her arms. The hospital gown ruined any effect it might have had. “I thought you’d on my side in this.”

Mina took a deep breath. “I am always on your side. But there aren’t any sides right now. I don’t have any love for the squidly queen, but she’s your wife.”

“And that’s why she doesn’t need to know. She’ll worry.”

Mina was this close to pulling out her hair.  Of course Michiru would worry, Mina was fucking worried. The doctor had laid out the odds. Haruka was dammned if she had the surgery, damned if she didn’t. And of course Mina couldn’t cry, if Mina cried finding out Haruka would never be convinced tell Michiru.

“I’m going to be okay, Mina. We’ve always been one in a million, haven’t we?”

Organ failure, the doctor’s words echoed in Mina’s head. Possible brain death. “What about Himeka?”

Haruka sat down on the bed. “Her class is reading Charlotte’s Web. Hopefully I’ll be home before they reach the end, she’s not ready for that.”

“Goddamnit Haruka, stop this. You can’t just pretend this isn’t happening.”

“That’s not…” Her eyes were glassy. “I’ve been reading a lot, Ami would be proud. Patients who believe they’re gonna be okay survive more than those who don’t.” She grabbed Mina’s hand. “I can’t keep believing if everyone says goodbye.”

The paper sheets crinkled as Mina say down too. “Why call me then?”

“I wasn’t going to. But I needed someone.” She looked down. “I’m sorry.”

“You’ll have to make it up to me later. Buy all my drinks next karaoke night.”

Haruka smiled. “I don’t make enough in a week to cover everything you drink.”

Mina forced herself to smile. “Better start saving then.”

They talked awhile about meaningless things, things that slipped through Mina’s mind like water no matter how much she tried to remember them later. Then the nurses swarmed in to prep Haruka.

“You have to go.”

“One hug. For good luck.”

Haruka didn’t argue, and she didn’t protest Mina holding on just a little too long. Mina needed to memorize this, bottle the feeling up for when Haruka wasn’t here.  “I’ll see you on the other side.”

“You don’t have to stay here.”

“Okay,” Mina said, as though there were the even the faintest possibility she was setting foot outside the hospital until she knew the outcome. One of the nurses ushered her into the waiting room.

It wasn’t like the waiting room for a normal doctor or the dentist or Mina’s favorite masseuse. There was no television showing the morning talk shows, no friendly issues of gossip magazines. Only scared people avoiding eye contact with all the other scared people. They all knew someone in the room would get bad news. You all don’t have to worry. It’s me today. Fuck Haruka, hiding this until the last possible moment. Fuck her, it was probably the car fumes that fucked her up in the first place, it was all her fault for picking a career like that. Fuck her for putting Mina in this position, fuck her fuck her fuck her.

Mina’s breath caught in a sob. All the scared people kept their eyes averted. No one wanted to acknowledge pain that wasn’t their own. She cried alone until her phone vibrated. There were signs plastered on every wall commanding her not to use it, but Mina didn’t care. Rei’s number flashed on her screen, a shine of something like hope.

“Hello?” Her throat was scratchy.

“Where are you? I’ve been wa—“

“I need you to come to the hospital.

Bring Michiru.”

Angstober Day 3- “It hurts”

~ sittingoverheredreaming ~ Leave a comment

This one is short, ~400 words, but I’m sticking it under a cut because writing it fucked up my day.

“It hurts.”

Michiru cradled Himeka’s little body in her arms. “I know, I’m sorry.”

She looked up with her big brown eyes. Her whole face was wet with tears. “Make it stop.”

Would that I could. Michiru pressed her face into Himeka’s hair. “I can’t, bear. I can’t fix this.”

Himeka was silent for a long moment. “Papa could fix anything with her tools,” she said slowly. It wasn’t meant to be an accusation, but Michiru felt its sting.

“She could.” She swallowed hard. “And the doctors tried hard with their tools, they really did.”

“But they’re not Papa,” Himeka said with finality, as though if Haruka had only operated on herself with a wrench, she’d be here. Michiru but the inside of her cheek. She promised herself Himeka wouldn’t see her cry. It was bad enough that she had to cry herself, she’d didn’t need the muck of Michiru’s feelings.  

“Mama?”

“Yes, bear?”

“I’m going to make this better.” Himeka wriggled off her lap and ran into the hall. Michiru couldn’t tell her to walk. Haruka had always ran, always said Himeka had to run in the house if she was going to race like Papa one day.

Himeka came back with a small box in hand. She climbed onto the bed next to Michiru and pulled out a bandaid. Little stars dotted it, for Papa’s little star.

With clumsy fingers, she stuck it on her shirt, on the left side of her chest. No, Michiru realized—over her heart. She put a second on Michiru in the same place. A pat with her chubby hand, and then a quick kiss. Just like Haruka always did when she scrapped her knee.

“There. We’re gonna be okay.” She sat and swung her legs back and forth. “It just might take some time.”

Michiru took a deep breath. “You sound just like your Papa. She’d be proud.”

Himeka leaned into her. “I still love her a lot.”

“You always will.” She rubbed her back. “I always will, too.”

Himeka dozed off slowly, spurts of hiccupping herself back awake until she finally gave way to a tiny snore. Michiru tucked her into the covers. She laid next to her instead of going to her own bed across the hall. Quietly as she could, she let herself cry into the pillow until she fell asleep.

Angstober Day 2- And there she was, in love with someone else

~ sittingoverheredreaming ~ Leave a comment

So Doc has been talking a lot about episode 111, and that led me to this. AU where being brought back to life entails a season 1- style memory wipe. ~1200 words. ETA: AO3 link, for those who prefer reading on there since this is more fic-length than yesterday’s.

There was a girl she saw sometimes that made her feel nostalgic. Haruka didn’t know why. She was sure they’d never met; she’d remember someone with such big gestures and a hairstyle like that. But sometimes their eyes would meet, and the girl would stop smiling, and Haruka would feel her own contentedness cave in, like it was suspended over a gaping hole inside her with fabric all too ready to tear.

She’d had enough of it, she decided one day.

Haruka marched up to her, ignoring her dark-haired friend. “Do I know you?”

The girl’s eyes went wide. She opened her mouth, closed it, grabbed her pigtails for support. “No.” She shook her head. “No. I have to go, I’m um, meeting Mamoru to study. Bye!”

I doubt that’s true, Haruka thought, though she couldn’t place why.

The girl’s friend stayed put. Her violet eyes raked over Haruka’s face. “You remember her.”

Haruka wasn’t sure how to answer.

“Usagi thinks it’s better if you stay how you are. That’s what she’d want. But you have a choice, if you want it.”

“A choice for what?”

The dark haired girl pursed her lips. “Do you know where Hikawa shrine is?”

“I think so, but that doesn’t answer—“

“Come there tonight. We’ll tell you everything then.”

“What? Who’s we? Why are you—“

“Save your questions. I don’t have time for the answers right now.” The girl turned and left.

—-

Logic would say not to go to the shrine. Logic would say when a mysterious girl lures you somewhere after dark without telling you anything, even her name, nothing good was going to happen.

But logic, Haruka mused as she climbed the stairs, had never really been her strong point.

Two girls waited for her at the top, the dark haired one, now in miko robes, and a blonde with a white cat in her lap.

“This is weird.”

“You have no idea,” the blonde said. “I’m Minako, the one with a stick up her butt is Rei—“

“Hey!”

“And this is Artemis.” The cat turned, and, Haruka swore, smiled. He had a crescent moon on his forehead. What the hell was going on?

“Um,” she fumbled to find a response. “I’m Har—“

“Haruka, we know.”

“Tone it down, Rei, we’re trying not to freak her out.”

It definitely wasn’t working. “You know, I think I’m actually just going to go. I think I… left the oven on.” She winced. Brilliant excuse, that was.

“Wait!” Minako stood up. “There’s an ache, deep down in your soul where you can’t seem to reach, like someone cut something out of you and left the wound open.”

“How—“

“It happened to us, once,” Rei said. “Months of dreaming of things we wanted but couldn’t remember, always waking up mourning a loss we couldn’t identify.”

“How did you make it stop?”

Minako wrapped her arms around herself. “You have to give up being an ordinary girl. Spend your life fighting.”

There was something familiar about her, the two of them. “You’re… “ Venus. Mars. The sailor soldiers that made the news every so often, though Haruka felt the pull of a deeper connection. “Am I one of you?”

“You could be, if that’s a life you want to take on.” Minako put a hand on her shoulder. “Either choice is a sacrifice. We can never truly forget what we are. But it’s not an easy life.”

“My life already isn’t easy.” She should slow down, think it through, but it had always been more her style to run into things head on. “If there’s something I’m supposed to be, I want to be it.”

“Are you sure?” the cat asked. Haruka found herself unsurprised that he could speak. “Once you remember, you can’t turn back.”

“I only know how to run forward anyway.”

“Well then.” Artemis looked up at her with big, sad eyes. “If that is what you choose.” His crescent  moon glowed. The light hit her like a bullet. A gun shot—she’d died. The pain she’d forgotten ripped through her. Usagi’s sad eyes as she shot, and Michiru cold body next to her.

Michiru.

Pain and love and a thousand other sensations pushed Haruka to her knees. She’d died, they’d died, and Haruka had been such an ass. And she’d forgotten, how had she forgotten, Michiru had died for her, and now… and now…

“Hey, buddy, it’s okay.” Minako was there, suddenly, rubbing her back. “You’re both alive. Everything is okay. But I know it hurts.”

Haruka wiped the tears off her face, but they kept coming. “Is she… has she remembered?”

“Only if she broke through on her own,” Rei said. “It’s quite hard to be deemed worthy of talking to Ms. Kaioh.”

“I’m going to see her.”

“Haruka, no—“

“Not tonight.” She was a mess tonight, did Mina really think she’d seek out Michiru like this? “Tomorrow.”

“I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

“Why not?”

“She… it just isn’t.”

Haruka’s stomach sank. Mina wouldn’t lie. But still… “I’ve wasted so much time. I don’t want to waste anymore.”

Mina bit her lip. “Then at least let me go with you.”

—-

The morning was sunny and clear. For the first time in recent memory, Haruka woke up feeling whole and hopeful. She’d make things right with Michiru. They hadn’t had to kill anyone, they deserved some happiness, didn’t they?

Mina led the way to a high-end tea shop.

“I can’t afford anything here.”

“Good, let’s leave.”

Mina tugged at her arm, but Haruka froze in place. There she was. Her hair was pulled back today. Haruka had always liked that, yet another thing she should have told her. She would, now. She could just go in, and say how nice Michiru looked, and then Michiru would remember. Of course she would. She loved Haruka, didn’t she? Even as Haruka pretended she felt nothing back. But that was over, and—

And someone sat down across from Michiru. A tall girl, with short brown hair and big muscular arms.

Michiru smiled.

Haruka felt a new wound rip open in her heart. Michiru had never wanted the life they’d had. She’d tried to stop Haruka from joining her, hadn’t she? Haruka thought it was to protect her, but maybe it was something else. Maybe Michiru had never wanted her. Maybe she’d died for guilt, not love.

Mina grabbed Haruka’s hand and squeezed. “I’m sorry, buddy.”

“No. She’s happy now. She should get to be happy. That’s what matters.” She turned away. “Let’s go.”

—-

Her date was talking. Michiru should listen, but listening only made it too clear who she wasn’t with. She looked up through the window.

There she was.

Haruka walked around the corner, holding Minako’s hand. Michiru’s breath caught. Perhaps she had remembered, and chose someone better. Perhaps she hadn’t, and was drawn to Mina on her merits alone. After all, why would she choose Michiru without fate to bind them?

She swallowed her tea, and her feelings with it. Hopefully, Haruka was happy now. That was the important thing. Michiru’s date reached for her hand. She took it.

Angstober Day 1, Alone

~ sittingoverheredreaming ~ Leave a comment

I’ll be doing full fics for some of the days, I promise, but I’m kicking off with more of a drabble.

—

Michiru stared at the door. She’d always known this was how it was supposed to be. The brief fantasy otherwise was over; she’d orchestrated its end. By now her plan was to be taking tea to calm her stomach, but she hadn’t found the way to move yet. She stared at the door.

She didn’t expect Haruka to come back through.

She made every effort to ensure she never would again. Not a word passed between them as Haruka packed her bags.

It was better that way.

Haruka was always going to leave. It was only ever a matter of time before she realized she deserved far more than what Michiru could give. If Michiru helped her along in that realization, well, that was better, wasn’t it? Less time wasted on an unlovable creature.

Haruka deserved the world; Michiru deserved nothing. This was right and fair.

And yet.

Michiru stared at the door.

She wasn’t supposed to feel lonely. She hadn’t, before, she’d been the ice queen just like everyone said. But now, even though Haruka was good and kind and should find someone equally worthy, she wanted Haruka to come back. Barge in, say no, they weren’t leaving it at that, she was going to fight for them dammit.

It had happened before.

That was why it wouldn’t happen now.

Michiru looked away from the door. She was alone. Just like she always should have been. In the silence, she curled into herself, her small prison that would hold her forever.

~ sittingoverheredreaming ~ Leave a comment

So, it seems this is the last fic party. It’s very bittersweet. For this month, I decided to revisit “Spring is a time for new beginnings,” since while a year ago it certainly wasn’t spring, something wonderful began.

Also, because I’m baby trash right now, and wanted to write something like this anyway.

The Night It Started
~1000 words
AO3 Link
Technically, it’s a continuation of this mini-fic, but it stands on its own just fine I think.

Michiru smiled and tucked a blanket around Haruka. She’d only managed to make it halfway through changing into pajamas before passing out sprawled on top of the bed covers. For a week straight she’d been running herself ragged. More than once Michiru had woken up in the middle of the night, either to find Haruka in the nursery fussing over Himeka or scrambling to find and react to new information. “Spring babies are more likely to develop skin cancer, we need to keep her out of the sun!” “I think we didn’t get the best brand of formula, one website says another has more nutrients…” She couldn’t have gotten more than a few hours’ rest since they brought the baby home. Now, finally, it had caught up to her.

And of course, now that Haruka had fallen asleep, Himeka started to cry.

Michiru slipped into the hall and shut the door. Hopefully that would mute the noise enough for Haruka to stay asleep. Part of Michiru wondered if Haruka had run herself so ragged over baby care out of the same fears Michiru had over how she’d handle the baby without Haruka there, but the rest of her knew Haruka believed too highly of her to even entertain the idea. She’d doubt herself to the point of terror before considering that Michiru might not be cut out for this. Michiru had never thought about having kids, barely felt like she had ever truly been a kid, much less had any idea how to love one. She entered the nursery with her own fear heavy on her shoulders.

Himeka lay in the crib Haruka had so carefully put together. Her small face was scrunched and red as she cried. Michiru couldn’t see what inspired such big, instinctual love in Haruka. She was just a small, loud, inarticulate person, and not one Michiru would call cute at the moment. But Haruka loved her, so Michiru had to try. “What is it?”

Himeka kept crying as Michiru lifted her up. She always quieted at least a little when Haruka held her. Now, it seemed, she only got louder. “Thank you for the vote of confidence.”

Himeka’s diaper was dry. Michiru tried to remember when Haruka had last fed her. “Are you hungry?”

Himeka did not answer. Michiru took her out to the kitchen anyway.

Haruka made preparing the formula while holding the baby look easy. It was not. Himeka kept squirming as she cried. The image of dropping her into the boiling water kept haunting Michiru’s mind, too clear to be a genuine vision but all the more frightening for it. She put Himeka back in her crib. Something akin to guilt tugged at Michiru’s heart for leaving her crying alone. The water took forever to boil, and even longer to cool. At long last she mixed it and tested the temperature on her wrist. It was a small miracle that Haruka had not woken up.

In the nursery, Himeka took the bottle greedily as Michiru held her. “You’re going to take after your Papa, I see. She’s also a bear when she’s hungry.” It was, perhaps, absurd to think Himeka resembled Haruka, but she was starting to see similarities in her face. Their eyes had the same shine. Maybe it was just because they spent so much time together. “Just so long as you wait a long time to share your Papa’s love of motor sports. That’s too dangerous for baby bears.” Michiru caught herself smiling. Himeka was looking at her now, still gulping, but focused on her. “Do you like being my baby bear?” Did she even know what a bear was? Haruka had bought her several teddy bears, but had she told her what they were? “Well, you can be Papa’s little girl, but Mama’s baby bear. How does that sound?”

Himeka gurgled.

Michiru took the bottle away and burped her, but she didn’t put her back in the crib. “I don’t know much about bears,” she told the now very attentive Himeka. “I might mess up with you a lot. My parents raised me to be just a dancing bear in their circus. But I want you to be a happy bear. I’m going to try, but I can’t make promises.” She tickled the baby’s tummy. “Will you forgive me?”

Himeka wrapped one tiny fist around Michiru’s thumb. Her pudgy fingers were soft and warm. Michiru felt something in her chest dissolve into the same warmth.

“We’ll shake on it, baby bear.” She lifted Himeka up to her shoulder and rocked in her chair.The light fuzz on top of her head brushed Michiru’s cheek. She was so tiny and vulnerable, all her support came from Michiru. Her little body clung on, but with trust instead of fear. Michiru felt words form in her mouth she’d only ever used sincerely on Haruka.

“I love you.”

——-

Haruka woke that morning disorientated, both by her state of dress and by being alone in their bed. She couldn’t remember falling asleep. The bedside clock told her she had been down all night. Her first thought was to wonder where Michiru was; the second was to worry about Himeka. She stumbled out of bed, shirt still on backwards and jeans still unzipped, and ran into the hall.

Her breath caught when she made it to the nursery. Himeka lay happily asleep in her crib. Michiru slept as well, the rocking chair pulled close enough that she could lean on the crib rail. One arm cushioned her head. The other squeezed through the bars to hold Himeka’s hand.

Haruka snuck out quietly and returned with their camera. After taking pictures from every angle she could conceive of without waking either of them, she sat down on the opposite side of the crib. She wanted to hold on to this moment forever. A few tears rolled down her cheek. She reached in to take Himeka’s other hand.  These were her girls, the beautiful start of her little family.