Tag: just in case

~ sittingoverheredreaming ~ Leave a comment

sittingoverheredreaming:

My dear and beloved coworker switched shifts with me so I can go to my fitting, and I am v nervous

THANK YOU ALL FOR YOUR KINDNESS the fitting went well, the shirt and vest fit perfect and the pants just have to be taken out a little and they said it’ll only take a day or so to make an adjustment

~ sittingoverheredreaming ~ Leave a comment

I’m gonna vent for a sec, sorry

I’m feeling some complicated feelings because I didn’t eat enough yesterday (hence why running was hard today), sometimes that happens when people talk about counting calories because it makes me feel bad/wrong that I don’t do it anymore, which is bullshit, but sometimes it’s so easy to slip back because I still know so much, I memorized so many counts, someone asks how a pbj is 580 calories and I KNOW how, I can rattle off the components and then I look at my sandwich and sugar bomb of a drink and it’s like UM

And then it is, of course, who else but the girl, so there’s the weird combo of the kinship that comes from knowing someone else goes through this shit, and the protectiveness that I feel over anyone I like even in a friend capacity, and extra helping of concern because I’m THAT person when I have romantic feelings, AND a little bit of HOLY SHIT MAYBE IT’S GOOD WE’RE NOT DATING BECAUSE I’D SWING TOWARDS NO EATING WHENEVER SHE USES THIS DUMB COUNTING APP IN FRONT OF ME

and really I just have to continue working on this, I know I’ve come a long way, but it’s just weird and complicated to deal with

~ sittingoverheredreaming ~ Leave a comment

captainsnumple replied to your photo “WOULD THAT SHE WERE but she’s like… The least Michiru person I know….”

I’M PRETTY SURE YOU KNOW YOURSELF WHAT’S BAD AND GOOD FOR YOU WHAT’S WRONG WITH YOUR COWORKER

THANK YOU SNUMPS. I always feel like I’m more of a sensitive baby than I have a right to be over stuff like this, because I never had a REAL problem, but it does send me reeling sometimes because I counted calories for like… seven years and in high school my entire self worth was tied to my weight and my grades SO I APPRECIATE PEOPLE NOT COMMENTING ON WHAT I EAT. IT’S ONE OF MY BIGGEST PET PEEVES.

But I just… stopped talking to her so she got the hint and left me alone at least. AND I DRANK MY WONDERFULLY BAD FOR ME DRINK AND IT WAS GOOD.

~ sittingoverheredreaming ~ Leave a comment

This isn’t that different from what all the lovely people in this fandom have been saying, but all this has made me want to formulate some of my own feelings/my own story.

I’m luckier than a lot of people in that growing up my family wasn’t very religious or outwardly homophobic. (My mom tried to raise my sister and I Catholic, but I was allowed to drop CCD when they tried teaching us how gross and sinful being gay was.) But there were still a HUGE amount of things, both from within my family and outside it, that led me to not realize I’m a lesbian for 21 years. And when I did start realizing I liked girls, there were so many ways I was told it was okay, I was probably still straight. Every girl is a little bi. There’s always that one exception. Boys think it’s hot if you’re open to being with another girl. You can’t really know until you have sex. You just haven’t met the right guy. And I internalized the fuck out of that shit. 
In highschool, I had one “exception,” so I called myself straight, because just one didn’t mean anything, right? (And there was no way I was going to look at myself hard enough to see how very differently I felt about her compared to the boys I dated)
When I got to college, things felt more open and I started having a lot more “exceptions,” so I went with “mostly straight.” I had a boyfriend, after all. And then I went withbi.
And then last year, I started to realize that besides my boyfriend, there weren’t any boys I liked at all. And when he broke up with me, I felt almost relieved.
I still called myself bi for awhile, but then as I started to come out more and more to people, it didn’t feel right. I confessed to one friend that I didn’t think I liked boys.
She was the first one to really vocalize the possibility that I was gay, and once I labeled myself a lesbian there’s hardly been a day that went by she didn’t reference it, in jokes or talking about romance or just whatever.
And THAT, more than anything else, has helped me be comfortable with who I am. Having someone call me a lesbian, constantly affirming that that identity was real and valid and ME. And calling characters the lesbians (or the bi girls, the queer girls, whatever the case may be) helps with that too. It’s all just validation that we exist and out feelings exist, and a lot of us really really need that.

~ sittingoverheredreaming ~ Leave a comment

So there are a LOT of things I really love about the SilMil dream sequences. They’re beautiful and romantic and *rambles ane cries forever*

BUT. I think storywise their existance does a lot.

First, how cute is it that Usagi admires herself? I really love the message there. See that beautiful beautiful princess? THAT’S YOU. That’s always been the case in Sailor Moon, even clumsy crybaby Usagi could ALWAYS be the princess, but I just feel a certain way about her explicitly thinking this. 

I also love that it puts the possibility of remembering in early. She’s not an entirely random girl who has a past life thrust upon her; when she finds out it won’t be a complete shock. There’s residue from her past life. Learning about it will make everything make sense for Usagi.

I’m strangely excited to find out just how Serentiy died in this version, because that will put the dream in a different light depending. If she killed herself over Endymion, these will get a lot sadder, because even with all that tragedy she still managed to project these moments of happiness to her next life.