~ sittingoverheredreaming ~ Leave a comment

Sometimes, even the most dutiful soldiers dream of the impossible

———————————

“Sometimes I think we should just.” Mina took a long drink. “Just hop in your car and leave it all behind.”

“Blaze away like outlaws?” Haruka laughed, and wasn’t quite drunk enough not to feel the strain on her bruised ribs.
Mina sloshed her drink around her bottle in a circle. She had a way of making beer look glamorous, if sometimes also tragic.

“You know who I was before all this? Who I could have been? Could still be if we just–” she gestured widely into the ether. “Don’t we deserve our lives? Our happiness?”

Haruka took a deep drink. “Let’s do it. Jet off at first light, not tell a soul.”

“You’ll do freelance mechanic work at truck stops to keep us going.”

“You’ll pickpocket the truckers and I’ll pretend not to notice where our money really comes from.”

Mina laughed, big and wild. “You’ve gotten too smart. This whole thing is ruining you.”

“We’ll have time to undo it. A simple life will make me simple.”

“We’ll never do any of this,” she indicated their bandages, “again. We’ll never fight, except for your stupid ego, we’ll never deal with damn premonitions of doom. Our future will be ours to make.” She hiccuped. “We won’t have duty, or destiny, or– or /her/.” Mina shook, but not from hiccups. “We won’t have a princess, we won’t have to protect her.” The tears started, big gobby tears that ate their way down her checks. “We won’t have stupid beautiful Usagi, or Rei breathing down our necks, or Mako throwing herself in dangers way, or, or, or any of it.” She wrapped her arms around herself. Haruka pulled her head onto her shoulder and let the tears soak through her shirt. “We’ll be free,” Mina sobbed. “All we have to do is leave.”

“We’ll be free,” Haruka whispered as gentle as she could this tipsy. “We’ll leave in the morning. First thing.”

She rubbed Mina’s back as she cried, offering empty promises until they both fell asleep on the couch.

~ sittingoverheredreaming ~ Leave a comment

sittingoverheredreaming:

My dear and beloved coworker switched shifts with me so I can go to my fitting, and I am v nervous

THANK YOU ALL FOR YOUR KINDNESS the fitting went well, the shirt and vest fit perfect and the pants just have to be taken out a little and they said it’ll only take a day or so to make an adjustment

~ sittingoverheredreaming ~ Leave a comment

This is such small potatoes, but I can deal with like zero things right now and I wasn’t scheduled to work Thursday so I said I could do my fitting for my finished suit at 12, and told my boss I planned to do it, and now guess who got put on to work at 12 on Thursday?

~ sittingoverheredreaming ~ Leave a comment

Before the news I was drawing a thing to get out some of my feelings, and I hadn’t planned on sharing it but now I want to in case it means anything to anyone else.

It’s nothing good, I don’t have the skill, but I needed a way to express sadness and love and something quiet I can’t really put into words, and this image kept being in my head so

I’ll always miss her.

Snumple Update

~ sittingoverheredreaming ~ Leave a comment

keyofjetwolf:

This is certainly not the news I wanted to bring to anyone. I just received word that Xenia’s body was found. I don’t have any other details, save that it wasn’t a crime. Given everything, I believe suicide is most likely.

This is obviously devastating to her family. Hell, it’s pretty fucking upsetting to us. I don’t have any clever words. I’ve been expecting this result since I first heard from her brother, though obviously you hold out some small measure of hope until hope runs out.

This is a tremendous loss for us. What do you say to ease that? I wouldn’t even know where to begin. I’d ask only that we all treat each other with kindness and understanding. Everyone will have to grieve and process in their own way, Some may want to talk. Some may never want to say a word. Anger, sadness, and everything in between is valid.

If you’re feeling particularly struck by this, please seek out help. We don’t need to lose anyone else. And love each other. There can never be too much of that in the world.

I will miss you, Snumple. I will miss you so much.

~ sittingoverheredreaming ~ Leave a comment

I’m not very good at saying what people mean to me, and I’m going to work on it, but for now I just want to say I love you all a lot, and if we interact at all you brighten my days so much

~ sittingoverheredreaming ~ Leave a comment

presidentnerd:

wouldntyoulichentoknow:

Four years old, on the floor of
Papa’s studio. Out of the way and not a
distraction, like she promised, with all the gravity of a preschooler
taking an oath, small voice and serious face. Holding his little cup of special
brushes, for the specialest projects. (Most special.)

Running the soft bristles over
her little fingers and her cheeks, closing her eyes when they get too close,
the quiet strain of his radio drifting overhead. Feels nice, feels soft-soft-blue, like the skies Papa
paints, and sunshine-through-the-window-warm. Wondering if Papa has extra paint, just a little, to share so she
can try too.

“Ami—stop it, don’t touch those,
you’ll ruin the bristles—where’s that book your mother left with you, you’re
supposed to be learning to read—”

Stoppiting quick. Don’t touch.
You’ll ruin.

Back to the book. Already knows how to read like Mama, doesn’t
know how to paint like Papa. Don’t touch. Wrong learning.

Out of the way and
not a distraction, like she promised.

Holy shit, this is so good and I’m gonna fight you how dare you make ME SAD WITH THIS.

HOW DARE YOU PUT AMI IN A CORNER WITH HER FATHER PAINTING AND IGNORING HER

WHAT THE FUCK FIGHT ME

IT’S GOOD IT’S SO GOOD I HATE THE FEELINGS I’M GETTING FROM THIS

Looking for information: Snumple is missing

~ sittingoverheredreaming ~ Leave a comment

docholligay:

keyofjetwolf:

image

This is very much not the post I wanted to be writing, but this is the point we’re at.

Several days ago, I was contacted by Snumple’s brother, Vladimir. Snumple – Xenia – had been missing for over 48 hours, and he was looking for any information on where she might be. I didn’t have any ideas, but through our conversation, he seemed to gain a larger picture of the sort of emotional state she’d been in lately.

Which, unfortunately, was not good. As you all know, she deleted her Tumblr a few weeks ago. It was an action that I found extremely worrying, particularly given Xenia’s increasing depression, but she was set on it. Still, after deleting it, her mood seemed to improve and I hoped things were getting better for her. Then emails sent to her began to bounce, saying the account had been deactivated.

The timing coincides with when she went missing. “Worrying” no longer seems sufficient.

Xenia’s been missing now since the morning of 16 May (it’s the 20th as of this writing), making it over four days since anyone last saw or heard from her. She left her phone and her passport at home. Her family and volunteers have been searching the city and surrounding woods, but have so far not found anything.

I know she was friends with many of you. If you have any ideas or information about where she may have gone, anything she might have mentioned or hinted at, please let me know so I can pass the information to her brother. And if by chance you’re in the area of St. Petersburg in Russia and might be willing to volunteer to help search, let me know that as well so I can find out where to direct you.

This situation is absolutely heartbreaking. I love Snumps very much. I hold out hope for the best, but even if the worst, she needs to be found so her family can know peace.

image

I don’t really have much to add to this, except if you know something please contact me or jet. And I’ve been sitting on this for a few days, so if I’ve been nasty to you you know why now.